Words from Sam!

Thank you Sam for being brave and for sharing your experiences with mental illness! You are incredibly awesome!

Katie and Britt

**************************

Mental Illness is a huge topic that I don't feel like is addressed properly or it's misconceived by the media, and posers. Since I was little I've battled and still pull through my mental disorders to this day. I struggle with Anxiety, Depression, and Body/Confidence issues. Everyday is a fighting battle, some take over more than others. It doesn't help either, when you have the public all around you, staring, judging, and bullying you or people that have the same issues as you do. I've been severely bullied throughout my life. I've had people tell me that they'll be there for me, and help me through my darkest times. Come to find out that not many people keep their promises. I've had so many people walk out of my life & say that they don't care about me anymore, and abandon me, and everything we had. I never feel good enough for anything. Then comes in my anxiety, the voice in my head telling me everyone judges you, no one likes you because of who you are.I'm constantly paranoid and i wish it'd go away. Anxiety then plays into my depression, making me feel like absolute shit. Everything that has ever been said to me, negative, all the bullying starts running through my mind like a marathon. Everything that people have told me about myself, I start to believe it all. the comments, the torture. I get so sad that sometimes I can't even leave my bed. It physically pains me. What triggers my anxiety and depression like no other, is my body image issues and self confidence. I'm not what most people would consider "attractive" in any way. I sit in the bathroom picking out every flaw. How giant my eyebrows are, how big my cheek bones are, how large my nose is, and how big my stomach is. But you know what has helped me over the years to help positively battle these problems? Is to learn to help yourself. Surround yourself with positive friends and realize that no matter what the voices in your had tell you, you CAN overcome this. Love yourself, because once you do, your life will change. I definitely don't love myself, but I do know that I'am worth it. Don't give up. Never be afraid to speak your mind, and speak OUT! Don't let the voices control you, because you're not those voices. Never be embarrassed of getting help. Getting help was one of the best things I've done for myself and I continue to do it. Yes i have good days, and bad days. But I'm 19 and I've traveled a long way since i was 8. Allow yourself to grow. Your disorders keep you back, and hold you back from your life, and your dreams. Never let anyone take those away from you, especially yourself.