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Victim, Survivor, Thriver

So, I have been reading self help books on PTSD and I found this in a book I was reading today and I think it could help others as well, so I decided to type it up and blog about it.


It is in the book "The Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook" by Glenn R. Schiraldi Ph.D


Let's all strive to be thrivers!!


Katie










Victim


Helpless


Out of Control


Angry


Hoping to be rescued


Perception of lacking choices


Self-pity


Passive


Payoff (secondary gains) persuade person to remain in victim role


Identity as a victim


In pain, numb, defeated


Avoidance of feelings “I’m still in the trauma”


Controlled by memories


Controlled by depression, anxiety, hatred, bitterness, revenge, physical complaints


Has not learned from the experience, likely to repeat trauma, victimization, shame, self-dislike


Self destructive behaviors.


Hiding


Feeling Fragile, vulnerable, defenseless


Sense of no future, preoccupation with the past


Discouraged, immobilized


 


Survivor


Satisfying sense of having gotten through intact or mostly intact.


Beginning to feel strong


Perception that one has resources and choices


Recognition of one’s potential to change and grow


Living one day at a time, coping from day to day: present life is primary focus


Beginning to take control


Beginning to “Thaw out” or heal living moderately well


Suffering  begins to lessen


Neutral about life – not depressed, but not happy.


Realization that one is outside of the trauma, one has gotten through it.


Extricated self from abuse (either in actuality  or at least one has mentally triumphed over it)


Confronting the trauma


Beginning to integrate


Guilt beginning to be resolved


Committed to healing, trusting and restoring boundaries


Influenced but no controlled by past


Mostly back to normal


 


Thriver


 Committed to move forward


Planning for the future


Active


Self-determined


Feels joy day to day


Achieving Mastery


Self-esteem; sees self as more than a victim- a valuable person


Reaching out to others, finding meaning and purpose


Ennobled by the experience; has grown from the trauma


Living well


Can endure remaining PTSD symptoms with relative comfort and acceptance


Guilt has been resolved


Generally satisfied with life


Perception that one has moved beyond the trauma


Acquiring peace, happiness, renewal, commitment to life, optimism despite scars, emopowerment


Committed to physical health


Committed to loving again


Feeling strong, compassionate, able to connect with others who are suffering and imperfect without a need to hide


Resilient, renewed


Has learned coping skills that did not exist before the trauma


Sense of humor


“beginner’s Mind” openness to possibilities


Finds ordinary life interesting, does not need “Adrenaline fix”

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